My stoic lesson for today is to go through my day observing how things go while wishing for the things that occur.

According to Epictetus I need two qualities to meet this challenge: “A complete view of what has happened in each instance and a sense of gratitude. Without gratitude what is the point of seeing, and without seeing what is the object of gratitude?” This makes intellectual sense, and it is painfully obvious that accepting whatever happens over the course of an entire day is a mind lift of Herculean dimensions.

I’m continually struck with how similar emerging evidence-based therapies are to philosophical thinking. Epictetus would have made an excellent social worker because of his life experience as a Roman slave. He had no social mobility, and no means of freeing himself, however, he could study philosophy with the same freedom as any average Roman citizen. Inner freedom cannot be taken away. My long-term goal is to understand my inner freedom and, as a result of this goal: I can become more human.

At this treatment center I only have myself to worry about, I want to, and do, rage against being here. Day 3 feels far away from Day 90, and I also know that next summer I’ll feel as if these ninety days were but a blip on the timeline of my life.

As Chuck Palahniuk wrote in Fight Club: “on a long enough timeline, everyone’s survival rate drops to zero.” Keeping in mind that I will die drives me to a see the problem I seek to understand thought philosophy. That problem is how to live a good life.

If a slave like Epictetus could follow orders every day with no personal agency over what he was allowed to do, and can accept what is and find an attitude of gratitude, then I as a free man can at least make the effort to improve my outlook.