Forgive my pun in the title; I couldn’t resist.

A unique feature of my bathroom is the shower rod. Specialty-made wall inserts prevent any additional weight, beyond that of the curtain, from being placed on the bar before it drops. I discovered this important fact while in the shower. I put my hands up on the bar to stretch out, leaned forward, and fell out of the shower.

After realizing what happened and why, I got up and pressed the bar back into the wall bracket. The bracket has two opposing springs along the base. Together, they are just strong enough to hold the weight of the bar and another few pounds. My 185lbs was clearly beyond the specs, and my fall illustrated the purpose of these curious failing fastenings.

As you probably deduced by now, it is impossible to hang yourself on a bar held up by these brackets. Good system for those on observation at a treatment center. This follows the advice that Thomas Joiner gives in his book, “Why People Die By Suicide”: an effective means of prevention is to reduce the lethality of the environment. I’m trusted enough here to possess a belt, but not trusted enough that I could hang myself with it. I understand this tricky balance. It’s the best for my recovery, and it means the residential staff do not need to always have their eyes on me.

For parents concerned about a child’s disclosure of suicidal thoughts, the same thinking applies. Make the environment less lethal. Remove any firearms from the home, hide knives or lock them away. Remove anything from their room than could bear their weight if hung off of. Take their door off their hinges. What an invasion of privacy I hear you exclaim. Kids have the privacy that they earn. When suicidal thoughts are expressed it is incumbent on the parent to modify the environment to be less lethal. By doing so, you reduce the obvious means of self-harm. What remains is the not do obvious. Drinking bleach or drain cleaner can be fatal, but unlike hanging, take time. Time that allows the senses to go back to normal, time that may result in s/he coming to you for help, or time for you to discover the attempt. That time may be enough to save a life.

If you’re concerned about your child, adjust their immediate environment accordingly. They won’t be happy, I wasn’t happy when my parents only let me sleep in the guest room with the door open, but I’m alive now writing about my displeasure instead of being dead and my parents could only ask what if.