Ron and Gordon

So this is a tough one to write as I have been struggling the last month with the loss of my son, Gordon James Corsetti. Every day is a bit of a slog, but I keep pushing on the best that I can. I have tried very hard to keep Gordon’s legacy alive by posting from time to time on his website, Mentally Agile.

It has been a challenge, but I do my best to express my feelings along with my family's every month.

I first would like to talk about my good friend Ron Mallonee. Ron left us in May of 2004 after a battle with cancer. For those of us who knew Ron, you will know that he lit up a room, and even though he was a lacrosse official, I don’t believe I have ever heard an unkind thing said about him, which is tough to say about an official :)

Ron was larger than life and a tremendous official and teacher of the game, along with being a skilled master carpenter. Ron was instrumental in the growth of lacrosse in Georgia and helped train almost every official in the early stages of our game. You always saw Ron when there was a lacrosse event in Atlanta, with his curly hair and shaggy mustache. He was a joy to be around and always had a smile on his face.

Mary Jo and I contracted Ron to finish our basement when Gordon and Caitlin were youngsters, and a job that should have taken 5-6 weeks took the entire lacrosse season. Like Ron, Mary Jo is a carpenter, and she would come in behind him and do the finishing work, which she loved to do. This would get Ron in a twist as he prided himself on doing perfect molding, and he could not believe how much of an expert MJ was. Now back to the 5-6 week job: you see, Ron marched to a different drummer and did not seem to care how much money he made on a job. So a typical day went like this: Ron would show up around 7 or 7:30 AM and get started. MJ, would make him lunch, and they would talk about wood and tools and things I know nothing about. He would work till around 2 or 3 o’clock and then take a shower, put on his official's uniform, and go out and officiate a lacrosse game. I can’t say he milked the job because it made MJ, happy to talk shop, but I was getting antsy and wanted to get everything complete, not to mention Ron played the soundtrack to "The Music Man" over and over again. There are only so many times you can hear “Ya Got Trouble in River City.”

While all this work was going on, Gordon and Ron developed a strong friendship, and Ron became one of Gordon’s first mentors in the lacrosse world. Ron had the patience of a saint, and he took Gordon under his wing and told him all about officiating, which helped him as he started his youth officiating career at 13. Mind you, Gordon would tell you that he had no clue what he was doing, and he wrote about it in his book "Advancement Rules: Improving Your Lacrosse Officiating.” It still amazes me that Gordon wrote a book before he turned 20, but as our daughter Caitlin would say, that’s “our little nerd.”

A year after Ron passed away, I was bestowed the honor of inducting him into the inaugural class of the 2005 Georgia Lacrosse Hall of Fame. His parents Ben and Laura, and his girlfriend Teresa Farmer, asked me to give his induction speech, which to this day is one of my greatest honors.

The Georgia Lacrosse Officials Association (GLOA), https://galaxref.com, is one of the blueprints on how to run a local officials association. I have known many of these men for over 25 years, and Ron’s silhouette is in the upper right-hand corner of their website. Incidentally, Gordon, our “little nerd,” designed the website that is still used today.

Two weeks ago, they asked me to attend their season-ending banquet where they give out awards for most games officiated, most improved official, etc. Last year, they gave out the Gordon James Corsetti Award to an official who exemplified Gordon’s character and professionalism. So I thought I was giving that award out to someone.

Unbeknownst to me, they were awarding Gordon the “Ron Mallonee Official of the Year Award”. Clyde Allen, last year's winner, presented me with the award, and the plaque is adorned with the past recipients, all of whom are great friends with Gordon: 2017 Jeremy Redmon, 2018 Herb Phillips, 2019 Mike Collver, 2020 Rona, 2021 Stuart Smith, and 2022 Greg Hite.

This was a tremendous honor, as I now have the plaque, and I will be presenting it to next year’s recipient. This award is kind of like the Stanley Cup, which stays with the winning team for a year, and I will cherish this award each and every day until next year.

If you attended Gordon’s memorial service, I mentioned in my remarks that I will do my best not to mention Gordon in the past tense. This helps me every day, as he is alive and well in my heart. While I pray every day for Gordon to watch over everyone in his life, our love for him is endless.

So, Ron and Gordon’s lives, entangled on Earth as adult to child, teacher to student, peer to peer, and friend to friend, now continue as Gordon will forever be part of Ron with this wonderful honor.

Gordon loved and admired Ron so much, and I know they are both smiling on us, blowing their whistles, throwing the perfect flag, and maybe humming tunes from “The Music Man.”

Please consider a donation to The Gordon Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation.

Gordon James Corsetti Foundation

Mental Health Resources

If you or someone you know feels hopeless or like they have no reason to live, call, text, or chat 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.

If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI (6264). For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).

In an emergency, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or call 911.

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