13 for 13: Thirteen Dollars, One Legacy, Countless Conversations

13 for 13: Thirteen Dollars, One Legacy, Countless Conversations

Sometimes something very small can carry tremendous meaning.

For our family, one of those things is the number 13.

Our son Gordon loved Number 13. He wore it proudly during his high school and college lacrosse days, and over time it became part of who he was.

Today, Gordon's No. 13 means something even greater to Mary Jo and me.

It represents his life.

His legacy.

His love of lacrosse.

His desire to help people.

And the message we continue to carry forward through the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation:

Take Care of Your Crew.

That is why we created 13 for 13 last year when we surpassed our goal of $13,000 and received generous donations from around the globe totally almost $ 23,000.

The idea is intentionally simple:

Give $13 in honor of Gordon's No. 13 and help us continue the work he started.

What Can $13 Really Do?

Someone might reasonably ask:

What difference can thirteen dollars make?

By itself, maybe it doesn't seem like much.

But put hundreds of $13 gifts together and something happens.

A conversation gets started.

A student learns that asking for help is a sign of courage.

A coach learns how to recognize when one of his players may be struggling.

An official realizes that the person standing beside him may need someone to check in.

A parent begins a conversation with a son or daughter.

A young person hears four important words:

“You are not alone.”

That is how change begins.

One conversation at a time.

One person at a time.

Sometimes, $13 at a time.

Gordon's Number Has Become a Mission

When we began the 13 for 13 campaign, we established a goal of raising $13,000 to support Mental Health Awareness and Suicide Prevention.

But this campaign was never really about reaching a number on a fundraising thermometer.

It is about what that money allows us to do.

Since losing Gordon, I have had the privilege of meeting extraordinary people and organizations working every day to help others.

The Foundation has supported organizations involved in mental health awareness, suicide prevention, counseling, youth programs, athletics, community outreach, disaster relief, and programs designed to create connection and belonging.

We have traveled to schools.

We have spoken with coaches.

We have talked with athletes.

We have worked with officials.

We have met with mental health professionals.

We have participated in suicide-prevention programs.

We have brought organizations together that might otherwise never have met.

And sometimes we simply sit with people who understand grief because they are living it themselves.

Every one of those experiences reminds me why this work matters.

Take Care of Your Crew

Gordon gave us many things to think about, but perhaps nothing has stayed with me more than these five words:

Take Care of Your Crew.

Your crew doesn't have to be a lacrosse team.

Your crew is your family.

Your coworkers.

Your classmates.

Your neighbors.

Your friends.

Your coaching staff.

Your officiating crew.

Your teammates.

Your crew is simply the people around you and people you will meet in the future.

Taking care of them doesn't require a psychology degree.

It begins with paying attention.

Who has become unusually quiet?

Who hasn't been around lately?

Who seems different?

Who keeps saying, “I'm fine,” when something tells you they aren't?

Maybe you ask again:

“No, really. How are you doing?”

And then you do something increasingly difficult in today's world.

You listen.

The Five Pillars

Much of our Foundation's work centers around five areas that can help us build Mental Agility:

Faith: Having something bigger then you that helps you in good times and bad.

Purpose:

Having something meaningful that gives us a reason to get up in the morning.

Structure:

Creating healthy routines and habits that provide stability when life becomes difficult.

Social Engagement:

Building genuine relationships and resisting the isolation and loneliness that can become so dangerous.

Compassion:

Recognizing that everyone we meet may be carrying something we cannot see.

These aren't complicated ideas. But living them intentionally can change lives.

The Power of a Crew

One of the reasons I continue to believe so strongly in sports, and particularly lacrosse, is that a good team naturally provides many of these things.

Purpose.

Structure.

Relationships.

Accountability.

Belonging.

Someone notices when you don't show up.

Someone needs you.

Someone has your back.

And eventually you learn that being part of a team means having someone else's back too.  That lesson shouldn't end when the game ends.  We should carry it into our families, workplaces, schools, and communities.

More Than a Donation

So when you give $13 to Gordon's Mental Agility Foundation, I hope you understand that we see it as much more than a donation.

It is a statement.

It says:

Mental wellness matters.

Suicide prevention matters.

Connection matters.

People matter.

And Gordon's life matters.

Your $13 joins someone else's $13.

Then another.

Then another.

And eventually hundreds of small acts of generosity become something much larger.

They become education.

They become outreach.

They become conversations.

They become hope.

Gordon's Jersey

Gordon's No. 13 jersey remains incredibly meaningful to me as I see everyday hanging in my office.

When I see that number, I don't simply see a lacrosse jersey.

I see my son.

I see his smile.

I hear his voice.

I remember his intellect and curiosity.

I remember how deeply he thought about life.

And yes, I remember the pain he carried.

But I also remember the people he helped.

That is the part of his story we intend to continue.

We cannot change what happened on December 2, 2022.

But we can decide what we do today.

We can talk.

We can listen.

We can educate.

We can encourage.

We can check on somebody.

We can help someone find professional support.

We can take care of our crew.

Will You Join Us?

Our request is simple.

Give $13.

Give it in honor of Gordon.

Give it in honor of someone you love.

Give it for someone who is struggling.

Give it for someone we've lost.

Give it because you believe that mental wellness deserves the same attention we give physical health.

And after you make that $13 gift, I would ask you to do one more thing.

Reach out to someone.

Send the text.

Make the phone call.

Invite someone to lunch.

Ask the second question.

Listen.

Your $13 helps our Foundation continue the work.

Your conversation may help someone continue theirs.

That's what 13 for 13 is really about.

One number.

One son.

One legacy.

One conversation at a time.

Take Care of Your Crew.

Love MJ and Coach Lou

Please consider donating to the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation to help us keep Gordon’s legacy alive.

Mental Agility Donation (Pay Pal)

ZEFFY Donation Option

Please consider donating to the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation to help us keep Gordon’s legacy alive.

Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for help. In an emergency, please call 911.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the
National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).
For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (
SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357).

Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for help. In an emergency, please call 911.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the
National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).
For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (
SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357).

Reflections

One of the nice things about social media is something pops up on your timeline. Everything about social media is built around algorithms and likes, dislikes, interest etc.. Today this came up on my timeline

Reflections:

I have been blessed to coach many young people over the past forty years, and whenever I speak about leadership, I always mention September 11, 2001, to the parents and players. It was a day that forever changed our world.

I always tell them that my best days were when I married my bride, MJ, and when our children, Gordon Corsetti and Caitlin Corsetti, were born. However, the worst day of my life was September 11, 2001. Sadly, another heartbreaking day came on December 2, 2022, when we lost our son, Gordon.

I do not want to diminish the feelings of those who lost loved ones 23 years ago by mentioning my son in the same breath, but the sense of emptiness and loss is something we all share deeply.

As a leader and coach, I’ve had the opportunity to speak to many groups. Last year, I addressed nearly 40 coaches and program leaders from the great state of Tennessee. It was a wonderful day, full of shared ideas, successes, and challenges as we discussed how to continue growing the game of lacrosse.

During that conversation, I spoke about my son, Gordon, to help others understand the importance of talking openly about mental health. Gordon's motto, "Take Care of Your Crew," has such a profound impact, and with every chance I get, I will speak about how just asking someone, "How can I help?" can make a world of difference.

Our Native brothers and sisters refer to lacrosse as the "Medicine Game" because it has healing powers. That could not feel more true to me than it does today.

September 11th will always be a sad day for me, as I remember people I love and admire, like my dear friend and former boss, Jimmy O'Neill, who we lost a few years ago. The picture below is Jimmy's Facebook profile photo, alongside some posts I’ve made over the years. Jimmy and I stood shoulder to shoulder on September 11, trying to lead our co-workers and friends through that day and many years afterward. We lost many friends we had known for decades in the business world.

Jimmy's brother, Matt O'Neill, has been a tremendous support to me as I grieve the loss of Gordon, just as his big brother Jimmy helped me and so many others with his leadership and compassion on that terrible day. (Matt, I love you.)

I would also like to extend my gratitude to Gordon's godfather, Roger Coleman, who continues to show great leadership through his work with Tuesday’s Children [https://www.tuesdayschildren.org].

As a country and as individuals, we must continue to show leadership, empathy, and love toward one another. When you say your prayers today, please remember all those we lost on September 11, 2001, their families, and anyone you have lost since that time.

Let’s all "Take Care of Our Crew."

Reflection on 9/11:

Like many of you, tomorrow is a very somber day for me. Out of respect for those who lost their lives and the pain their families continue to endure, I avoid social media on this day. I implore you to take a few minutes from your day to reflect on those who lost their lives, as well as the brave men and women who rushed into the buildings when everyone else was rushing out. Our firefighters, police officers, and first responders made unimaginable sacrifices. The victims at the Pentagon and on Flight 93 will also remain in our hearts forever.

I’ll never forget that day. I was supposed to be there, but Anthony Conroy rescheduled our meeting for the following week, sparing me. Even after 19 years, I still carry a wide range of emotions—sadness, anger, and reflection. While I try to stay positive, this is one day when I allow myself to be sad. The note below, which popped up on my timeline from nine years ago, serves as another reminder of this difficult time.

A Decade of Reflection:

Ten years ago, on a similarly beautiful morning, I looked up at the clear blue sky and couldn’t help but remember September 11. I reflect daily as I look at Lt. Kevin Donnelly’s (my wife’s cousin, Ladder Company 3 NYFD) mass card, which sits in my office. I also think of my college housemate, Tommy Crotty, who played basketball for the Marist Red Foxes, and of the great Cornell lacrosse player, Eamon McEneaney, one of my counselors at Stroudsburg Lacrosse Camp, who I modeled my game after. Both were taken too soon on that day.

I remember the 25 business colleagues we lost, and the countless families who were forever changed. I also remember the brave military men and women who continue to protect our freedom.

Lest we forget September 11, 2001.


Please consider donating to the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation to help us keep Gordon’s legacy alive.

Mental Agility Donation

Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for help. In an emergency, please call 911.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the
National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).
For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (
SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357).

That's what friends are for - Part Deux

The string lights hanging overhead illuminated the dining room at Patrizia's, casting a warm golden glow over a crowd that felt far more like a family reunion than a fundraiser. Long tables draped in white linens were filled with familiar faces, friends from West Babylon, classmates from Marist University, family members, and my brothers from Shady Acres, a group bound together by decades of friendship, loyalty, and shared memories.

Each year, the Shady Acres boys gather for a week of golf, beach time, laughter, storytelling, and yes, a little harmless mischief. Sometimes our annual pilgrimage takes us to the Jersey Shore. Other years we head to upstate New York. This year, however, we returned home to Long Island, where Roger Coleman secured a beautiful house directly on the beach in Long Beach.

As always, the week was filled with old stories, new memories, and the kind of camaraderie that only develops over a lifetime.

When Tony first suggested hosting a fundraiser for the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation at Patrizia's, I have to admit I was a little uncomfortable. Shady Acres has always been our special time together, a week to reconnect, recharge, and enjoy each other's company.

But if you know Tony, you know there is no such thing as a casual suggestion.

Tony lives by the motto passed down from his father:

"No Let Up."

Once he sets his mind on something, there is no stopping him.

Thankfully, he didn't let up.

From the moment guests arrived, Tony and his staff moved through the room with the effortless grace and generosity that define true hospitality. Every glass stayed full, every plate overflowed with incredible food, and every guest felt welcomed. They weren't simply hosting an event; they were helping preserve and extend Gordon's legacy.

As the evening unfolded, I found myself standing at the front of the room with a microphone in hand. The conversations softened, the laughter quieted, and for a moment the room became still.

I looked out at the faces before me, people who had helped carry Mary Jo and me through some of the most difficult days of our lives.

"I want to thank my family," I began. "My friends from West Babylon, my Marist brothers & sisters, and the guys who have always had my back."

My eyes moved across the room toward John, Tommy, Roger, and Tony, who stood nearby. Dave and Vince had already headed home for prior commitments, while Rick and Gerry were unable to attend, but all of them were very much present in spirit.

What struck me most was seeing people I had not seen in more than forty years. Yet somehow, as soon as we started talking and laughing, it felt like no time had passed at all.

My friend Megan Kelly captured the evening perfectly when she later wrote on Faceboook:

"Lou, your crew showed up! What a great night! So much love in the room with your family and friends. It was nice to see everyone that came out to honor your son Gordon. Thank you, Tony, for hosting in your beautiful restaurant. Love to all."

She was absolutely right.

The room was overflowing with love.

During my remarks, I briefly spoke about the Five Pillars of the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation:

Video courtesy of Craig Rappaport https://tawprod.com/

• Everyone needs Faith
• Everyone needs Purpose
• Everyone needs Structure
• Everyone needs Social Engagement
• Everyone needs Compassion

These principles have become the foundation of our work and the framework through which we try to help others build resilience and hope.

Gordon's life was dedicated to lifting the stigma surrounding mental health and suicide. He believed deeply that vulnerability was not weakness but strength. He often spoke about what he called "Elite Vulnerability", the courage to be honest about struggles and the willingness to ask for help when carrying life's burdens becomes too heavy.

One of Gordon's favorite reminders was simple:

"You don't have to carry your sack of rocks alone."

Looking around the room that evening, I realized his message was alive and well.

It was present in every hug between old friends.

It was present in every shared memory between the West Babylon crew.

It was present in the laughter of the Marist alumni and the unwavering support of the Shady Acres brothers.

Most of all, it was present in the collective decision of everyone in attendance to show up, not just for me, Mary Jo and Caitlin, but for Gordon and the mission that continues in his name.

As the evening wound down and conversations returned to stories, jokes, and memories, I found myself reflecting on life's journey.

Like everyone else, my life has been filled with peaks and valleys, triumphs and heartbreaks. Yet throughout the evening, I could feel Gordon's spirit filling the room.

The gathering at Patrizia's wasn't simply about remembering a loss.

It was about celebrating a life.

It was about friendship.

It was about community.

It was about hope.

And it was about proving that the people who love us never truly leave us.

As I looked around the room one final time, I couldn't help but think of the old song that has comforted so many of us over the years.

Because on that night, surrounded by lifelong friends and family, it became abundantly clear:

That truly is what friends are for

Please consider donating to the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation to help us keep Gordon’s legacy alive.

Mental Agility Donation

Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for help. In an emergency, please call 911.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the
National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).
For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (
SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357).

THE NCAA's

I can still remember when Gordon received his first NCAA lacrosse assignment and how excited he was. Like so many officials, he worked his way up through the ranks, starting as a youth official, then becoming a high school official, and ultimately earning the opportunity to officiate at the NCAA level. He loved the game, respected the craft of officiating, and worked tirelessly to improve every year.

One of his proudest accomplishments was receiving his first NCAA playoff assignment while working at USA Lacrosse in Baltimore. It was a significant milestone in a journey that he had earned through hard work, dedication, and a genuine love for the game.

During his time at USA Lacrosse, Gordon was fortunate to be surrounded by incredible mentors. His manager, Charlie Obermayer, was not only an outstanding leader but also someone who truly cared about Gordon as a person. Charlie understood Gordon's struggles with mental health and stood by him during difficult times. He was always in Gordon's corner, and over the years their professional relationship grew into a genuine friendship.

Gordon was equally blessed to learn from some of the most respected names in lacrosse officiating, including Walt Munze, Jim Carboneau, Al Blau, Matt Palumb, Mike Hyland, and of course Kevin Forster, who became one of Gordon's closest friends. Kevin is a straightforward, no-nonsense official affectionately known throughout the lacrosse officiating community as "The Dream Crusher." Naturally, Gordon eventually earned the nickname "Junior Dream Crusher."

For lacrosse fans, the final two weeks of the college season are sacred. The playoffs culminate on Memorial Day Weekend and the Final Four, the biggest stage in the sport for both the men's and women's Division I, II, and III championships. Those of us who are true lacrosse mavens never miss it. There is simply nothing else like it.

This year, Charlie did something incredibly thoughtful. He secured a game ball from the NCAA Men's Final Four semifinal between Princeton and Duke in Charlottesville, Virginia, and had Gordon's initials placed on it. The officiating crew for that game, Referee Joe Cieslak, Umpire Josh Blaisdell, Field Judge Dan Bennett, and Box Official David Taibl, all knew Gordon well. What made it even more special was that each of them wore Gordon's "Take Care of Your Crew" bracelets during the game.

Every week, I receive notes, emails, social media messages, and texts from people around the country, and often around the world, sharing stories about Gordon. They tell us how much he impacted their lives, how much they learned from him, and how deeply they miss him.

Those messages make me smile. They make me cry. Most of all, they remind me what a beautiful soul Gordon is. I rarely speak about my son in the past tense because his influence is still very much present in the lives of so many people.

Charlie's gesture filled my heart in a way that is difficult to describe. I have always believed that Gordon would have worked a Final Four and eventually a National Championship game. As his father, perhaps I am biased, but I also know how talented and respected he was. He was that good.

While Gordon is no longer with us physically, I have no doubt he was smiling down on that crew, proud of the game they were working and wishing them all a great day on the field.

Charlie, thank you for this incredible tribute to Gordon. It meant more to our family than you will ever know. Moments like these remind us that Gordon's legacy continues to live on through the people he influenced, the friendships he built, and the lessons he shared.

And perhaps no lesson was more important than the one he repeated so often:

"Take Care of Your Crew."

Please consider donating to the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation to help us keep Gordon’s legacy alive.

Mental Agility Donation

Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for help. In an emergency, please call 911.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the
National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).
For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (
SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357).

Gordon J. Corsetti - Mental Agility Lacrosse Tournament

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Tri-State Lacrosse Community Unites for the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Tournament to Champion Mental Health Awareness

ATLANTA, GA — The Gordon Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation is proud to announce its premier annual fundraiser, the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Lacrosse Tournament. Bringing together high school teams from Alabama, Georgia, and Tennessee, the event serves as a powerful tribute to Gordon’s enduring legacy as an athlete, official, and mental health advocate.

The tournament is more than a competition; it is a mission-driven gathering designed to honor Gordon’s profound love for the "creator’s game" while raising critical funds for suicide prevention and mental health resources. As the Foundation’s largest fundraising effort of the year, 100% of the proceeds will go toward providing tools, workshops, and support for individuals navigating clinical depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation.

"Gordon believed that mental agility, the ability to attack depressed thoughts and gain mastery over the mind, was a skill that could be taught, much like the fundamentals of lacrosse," said Lou Corsetti, President of the Mental Agility Foundation. "By bringing together the lacrosse communities of three states, we are not just playing a game; we are carrying Gordon’s light and ensuring that no one has to fight their internal battles alone."

A Legacy of Resilience Gordon Corsetti was a prominent figure in the lacrosse world, known for his "Elite Vulnerability" and his work as a high-level official. Having lived with clinical depression and generalized anxiety disorder, Gordon dedicated his life to sharing methods, such as breathwork, mindfulness, and cognitive behavioral tools, to help others live more fulfilling lives. This tournament embodies his vision of staying "calm and grounded in any situation," whether on the field or in life’s most difficult transitions.

Event Highlights:

  • Regional Competition: Featuring top-tier programs from across the Southeast (AL, GA, TN).

  • Mental Agility Education: On-site resources and information regarding suicide prevention and the "7th Shelf" tools for mental resilience.

  • Community Impact: All funds raised will support the Foundation’s mission to provide information, tools, and hope to those facing mental health challenges.

About the Gordon Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation The Gordon Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation is a non-profit organization committed to mental health awareness and suicide prevention. Grounded in Gordon’s vision, the Foundation provides resources and different methods of thinking to help those with and without mental illness navigate life with mastery and hope. For more information, tools, or to make a donation, please visit mentallyagile.com.

Please consider donating to the Gordon J. Corsetti Mental Agility Foundation to help us keep Gordon’s legacy alive.

Mental Agility Donation

Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for help. In an emergency, please call 911.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the
National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).
For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (
SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357).